The Purple Bottle
by BrookenLucas12
Summary: It’s been a year and they are officially the most dysfunctional couple in the world, because she still won’t tell him she loves him, except for once, and it just kind of slipped out when they were talking on the phone. BL, future, one-shot.


_**Author's Note: **_I wrote this in October of last year, and I thought it was crap. I shut it away in my documents, and then today, I stumbled upon it, re-read it, did some editing, and decided, why the hell not? I love Brooke and Lucas. And I know a lot of you do too! And I know all of us BL-ers hate the show right now for trying to make us feel like our ship means nothing, so I figured even if this sucks, it's still better than what's going on for BL on the show right now, right? Some logic, I guess.

Also, it's Easter. I don't know if that counts as a reason to post this, but I'm counting it.

_**Spoilers: **_This is pretty much post season four (alternate universe). But let's pretend that Lucas and Peyton broke up at the end, and that the whole Psycho Derek thing didn't happen, because let's face it, lamest OTH storyline _ever_.

_**Oh, and!: **_I'd like to dedicate this story to every fan of Brooke and Lucas that's reading Movie Script Ending right now. Thanks guys. Title credit goes to Animal Collective.

_**One more thing: **_This idea actually came to me in a dream. Yeah, I dreamed the entire end part. The whole Brooke saving the environment thing, too. So it may seem a little OOC, but since it was the whole basis of the story, I thought it was kind of crucial to put it in.

I hope everyone enjoys this. (and reviews)

* * *

_**The Purple Bottle **_

She reasons that maybe things would be different between them if he'd never broken her heart in the first place. If him and Peyton hadn't had a secret that nearly would have killed her if she hadn't forced a hard shell over her broken body, an adaptation that resulted from the most excruciating pain she'd ever felt in her life. She never would have been so scared of loving him; she would have never made a stand as such an independent woman that needed no one.

But things did not go differently, and here she is; still caught up with him, and still never really letting herself trust him. He knows how she feels, and it's not like she has to tell him. It's written in her body language and emotionality and he's always been good at reading that kind of stuff.

She thinks now that she should just end it; it never really could have worked out anyway. _Even_ if he'd never cheated on her. They are too different and too alike at the same time; an imperfect balance of each other.

* * *

She returns to Tree Hill for the first time since high school in November of her twenty-first year.

This is the first of many large mistakes she'll make. She really never should have called him to tell him she'd be visiting. She really shouldn't even be visiting in the first place.

When she sees him, she regrets coming even more. Because her knees start to wobble beneath her new designer skinny jeans, and suddenly she's finding it harder to walk in heels than normal.

When he sees her, he twirls her around and holds her tight, and he tells her he's missed her, oh god, he's missed her, and she can tell it's true, but that certainly doesn't make it any easier to hear. She makes the mistake of telling him she's missed him too, and she knows it's the truth because as she says it, she finds herself pulling him closer and inhaling the familiar scent of his t-shirt.

Their courting period is shorter than usual. Usually, it takes months of angst and pain for it to work out the way it should. And even then, it never really works out. But this time, they are the only people still in Tree Hill except for Nathan and Haley, and well, _they're_ already married, so it's kind of a no-brainer.

Their first time "catching up for dinner", they end up going back to his house and cuddling all night. There's the occasional kiss, and each one means more to her than the last. She wishes she could tell him this, but she knows it won't last, so she swallows her words and stares into his eyes all night, and she's really never stopped loving him.

* * *

She finally convinces him to move to New York with her (probably the most effort she's ever put into their relationship) after a few months, and he agrees only because she tells him he can live with her, and that's all he wanted anyway.

When she and Haley talk on the phone, Haley tells her that Peyton is _pissed _about the union of her former best friend and former love, but then Peyton calls her to congratulate, so she's not really sure. Truthfully, she doesn't even know how Peyton found out they were dating, and dissimilar to last time, she doesn't really _care_. Because Peyton isn't there.

Lucas tells her he loves her for the first time as he's moving his couch into her - sorry, _their_ - apartment and she chuckles, and says, "Hey, we should probably keep moving if we want to be finished by tonight."

She chooses an unfortunate choice of wording, because for the next hour, all she can think to herself is, 'I hope he doesn't think I meant I wanted _us_ finished by tonight,' and then she scolds herself for being so desperate.

Her shell is still securely fastened over her once-broken body, and she'll move on if she has to.

* * *

It's been a year and they are officially the most dysfunctional couple in the world, because she still won't tell him she loves him, except for _once_, and it just kind of slipped out when they were talking on the phone.

He doesn't tell her that it bothers him, although she knows it does, and one night as they are laying in bed, he fidgets until finally he brings her close, and he tells her, "Hey, we've been together longer now than we ever were."

She'd like to say, "You think I don't know that?!" but instead she lightly kisses the tip of his nose and says, "I know, sweetie. But I'm really tired, so.."

"Come on," he urges. "Celebrate with me."

And she says, "There's nothing to celebrate. For most people, this would be normal."

And she turns and goes to sleep, but not really, because she lies awake for the rest of the night, and she can feel him awake, too, and she wonders how he could ever stay with a monster like her.

* * *

She tells him she loves him in a moment of vulnerability.

One of her runway shows has just gotten a bad review - in comparison to the fifty good reviews she got - and she finds herself crying hysterically in their bathroom, which has always been too small for two people.

Lucas comes in, home early from a meeting with his publisher, and when he finds Brooke sobbing on the ground, he wraps his arms around her and rocks her back and forth, and when he pulls away he tells her everything she's ever wanted to hear about herself.

And before she can stop herself, she says, "I love you."

He looks like a child on Christmas morning, and he pulls her close, and they make love on the bathroom floor, and she doesn't even care that it's really much too small for two people.

* * *

Peyton ruins everyone's lives - and by everyone, really only Brooke's - by coming back into her and Lucas' life one rainy afternoon soon after Brooke's recent confession.

Brooke tries to pretend she's happy as Peyton tells her she moved to New York to be with her. To be with her! How nice! Only, Brooke knows Peyton's heart is still hoping to connect with Lucas' and frankly, it isn't fair.

So what does she do? Fight like hell for the man she loves, of course. Oh _wait _- no, that's what a _normal_ person would do. But considering she's Brooke Davis, she pulls an Edgar Allen Poe and tries to sabotage the relationship _herself_, considering it was bound to happen anyway. She tells Lucas he should show Peyton around New York, and when he politely declines, she gives him attitude until he agrees.

They've taken so many steps forward in a doomed relationship, and now she's pushing them a million more back.

She doesn't know why she does this, but she figures that somehow it's really his fault, anyway.

* * *

A few weeks after Peyton's comfortably settled in, the bitch has the nerve to ask Brooke to lunch so they can _talk_. When Brooke calls Haley to complain about it, Tutor Dumb-ass scolds her for being so judgmental. "Maybe she wants to catch up, Brooke. Why do you have to be so cynical?" She says in a clipped tone, and Brooke figures she's in a bad mood because Nathan's her husband, so she lets it go.

At lunch, of course the first thing Peyton says is, "So what's going on with you and Lucas? You guys act so strange around each other."

She chews on a breadstick, wishing she'd brought a tape-recorder so she could rub this in Haley's face, but she simply sighs loudly. "We're fine," and then coughs, "no thanks to you."

"What's that?"

"Huh? Oh, nothing. Frog. In my throat."

The bitch has the audacity to ask if she wants a cough drop.

* * *

Lucas' book is boring. His first one was all about high school, and her, so it was interesting. But this one is all serious and depressing and talks about political science, and _ew! _

He gave her a copy of the manuscript three weeks ago, and you'd think she'd be finished by now - _especially_ with all his pestering; "Did you see that thing on page sixty-two?" "Oh, hey! What did you think about that paragraph in the sixth chapter?" - but she can't get through it.

He uses words way too big for her vocabulary (English was simply _never_ her cup of tea) and she ends up buying a thesaurus, a dictionary, _and_ an encyclopedia because she needs all the resources she can get.

It takes her hours just to translate one chapter, and a whopping month and a half to finish the whole book, but by the end, she gets the message and her vocabulary has grown so much, she uses sentences like, "Suffice to say, Margaret is a complete curmudgeon when it comes to societal issues."

When she finally drops Lucas' manuscript back on his desk, he looks up at her with a hopeful glance. She says, "It was nice. I thought the parallel between Sam and the bird were cool."

What she _doesn't_ say is, "I spent every second of the past month and a half trying to figure out your stupid book, and I now know every word, every pop culture reference, every symbol, every theme. I did it for you because I'm stupid and I love you and I want you to know that I care. The book wasn't as boring as I thought it was when I didn't understand it, and you'll probably be the next great American author. I'm hoping I'm the object of Sam's desires and the name has just been changed because you didn't really want me to know, but if I'm not, I guess that's okay. Sam and Rebecca's story isn't remotely as romantic as ours anyway. We're special, we really are. I love that you're so smart. In fact, I love everything about you. Even you're snoring which is getting _way_ out of control."

Of course, when Peyton reads the manuscript, she replies with an e-mail so long, Brooke can't simply read it over his shoulders, so she taps into his account when he's sleeping. The girl rambles on and on and on and on and on for so freaking long that Brooke feels like Ross reading Rachel's eighteen page letter.

Lucas tells her later that Peyton wrote him a really insightful review and he's really going to take it into account, and she grins at him, but inside she knows there's no way in hell Peyton knows that book better than her.

* * *

Lucas sits down with her one night when she's watching Lost, and her eyes are so fixated on the screen that the only way she really knows for sure is because the couch sort of bounces with his added weight.

He kisses her and she slaps him away. Doesn't he understand this is a crucial moment in TV history?

"She's cute." he comments and she fights the urge to throw up. He's talking about Juliet, the blonde, curly-haired weird looking _other_ who has no business seducing Jack.

"Um, no she's not. Kate's cute. She's a freak." She clicks her tongue. The exchange between the three characters on the screen is getting heated; Jack must choose.

"Oh. Well, I mean, she seems smart."

"Uh, Kate's smart! She's been a criminal on the run for years, and she's doing a damn good job at it."

He sighs. Obviously he'd just made the comment in the first place because he thought he would get a positive reaction out of her, and now look at what he's started. "The other one just seems nice."

"Yeah, she's just the safe choice."

"Safe's good." He tells her, and when she turns to look at him, his eyes are still on the screen and suddenly she's feeling very unsafe.

* * *

She's been on this save-the-environment high for months now, and so it was her idea to come to Africa to help endangered animals, but she asked only Lucas to come, and _of course_ Peyton had to insist on her coming as well, since she wanted to practice her "photography of the gorgeous country".

The two men from the foundation, Mark and George, are clearly a gay couple. One is a little overweight and the other is a little underweight, and they balance each other out; they make sense. Brooke doesn't think she and Lucas make sense anymore. Maybe they never did.

Peyton accidentally lets all of the chickens out of the pen in Mark and George's little house, and so Brooke talks with the couple while Peyton and Lucas chase them all back into their coops, laughing with each other and being generally flirtatious. Mark and George are pretty cool, and they spend some time eating chocolate chip cookies and discussing giraffes and elephants.

When they go on a trek through the jungle, Brooke feels herself straying from Lucas more than ever. She's been rude to him this entire time, really, and right now, she's realizing the relationship won't last much longer. They'll probably break up in the airport on the way home, so that way she and Peyton can switch seats so _they_ can sit beside each other.

Peyton "trips" and Lucas catches her, and Brooke makes an off-handed sarcastic remark about how he's always saving her, and then speeds up to catch up with George, who's in ridiculously good shape for a man as overweight as he is.

Lucas stands behind her with a frown on his face, and before she knows it, he's caught up to her and stopped the entire group by pulling her towards him and turning her to face him.

"Lucas!" She blurts out, frustrated. She pushes him away - physically of course, because he's already been pushed away as much as possible emotionally. He's a lot heavier with that big knapsack though, and she's got one too, so she's not going to be escaping anytime soon.

"Listen to me," He says firmly, his grip on her arms not loosening. "I know that you've never trusted me, and I _know_ that I haven't given you reason to trust me in the past. But I love you. And I - I want to spend the _rest _of my life with you. I'm trying to show you all this and that you're the most important person to me, but you just don't want to get it."

"I--"

"Stop. I'm talking. I - I don't know what you want from me, and honestly, I don't know why I'm still here, because it doesn't seem like you want me the way I want you. And I do. I want you. I want you so badly most days it's hard to concentrate. And you know what? I _need_ you. I need you, okay? It's probably pretty stupid, and I'm embarrassed as _hell_ right now, but… there it is. The more you pull away, the more available I become. I know! I'm a pathetic loser, and I… I love you."

She can't move or breathe or even think. All around her, movement has stopped but she hardly notices, because all she sees is his eyes and his lips and his jaw and his cheeks and the soft stubble beginning to form on his face.

He's never told her he needed her before, but it's certainly good to hear. Actually, it makes her feel kind of euphoric. Tears begin to fill her eyes, and he loosens his grip on her arms, and begins to back away, clearly expecting to elicit no response from her.

And before she can stop herself, she launches herself into his arms. He doesn't really expect it, so they stumble backwards, laughing. From around them, they hear cheers.

"Marry me," he whispers into her hair, wild and un-tamed, and she wants to squeal, because for the first time in her life - she feels _okay_ about them. She's fine with where they are, and her insecurities because he _needs _her. He _wants_ her. He _loves_ her.

"I love you, I love you, I love you," she tells him as she kisses his neck and he carries her forward.

* * *

They are married three days later in an interestingly traditional African ceremony.

George and Mark are there, and even Peyton scores an invite. She holds up the phone, connected all the way back to Tree Hill, so Haley can be there in spirit.

Brooke knows it'll probably never work. They have too much working against them.

But maybe it will. They're an imperfect balance of each other, and it's kind of always been their niche.

Maybe she's just a masochist, but he clearly is too.


End file.
